Today was a struggle.
I'm so used to God just making everything easy?
All I have to do and trust and He makes amazing things happen.
I knew that it wasn't always gonna be that easy
I was hoping that it would last a little longer.
but its seems that I am once again being pushed to change to grow.
When I talk about God so many times it just flows out of me like a waterfall
and I can feel God speaking through me.
Today as I was sharing, every word was a struggle to get out. Maybe it's because I didn't prayer enough or prepare better. But I don't think that was it because I did pray. I sorta felt this was coming. God was saying...."ok...its time to take off the training wheels"
Even though there were awkward silences and times when it seemed like people didn't get it. I still held on to to promise that God was there and that he was in control. When we started to get into groups I didn't know what to expect. I felt like I had failed, yet I still had faith that God is good. We started to share first about small things and as we were sharing this girl in my group really opened up and started to cry and talk about her struggles and pains. In that moment I knew that this was part of God's plan. I didn't know what to do so I just prayed for that girl. It wasn't a deeply moving or spiritual prayer. It was a clumsy stuttery prayer. Through this girl I was shown how God loves everyone.......and how I have just been treating people as objects more than anything. I saw that every person is loved by someone and most importantly God.
Sometimes God doesn't work in ways you expect he humbles you but his work is still done.
I always knew that. I am still believing that God is in control.
I know that harder things are coming.
I just pray that I can overcome these obstacles
